How to Pause in a Relationship

Sometimes you want to press pause in a relationship and just sit alone while the outside world rushes in an endless race. At work, you can take a vacation, move plans, turn off your phone, and send completely annoying elements to hell. When a partner gets on the list of those from whom you need to take a break, the stakes increase. Just limiting contacts for a while, and then returning and starting all over from where you left off, will not work.

A break, with a careful presentation, is not a harbinger of a subsequent breakup, but an opportunity to think, reevaluate something, gain strength and save the relationship from collapse. Just explaining the value of a pause is an art that requires a detailed approach. And of course, some luck.


Taking breaks all the time isn’t going to work. Such a move must be justified, logical and necessary. If you feel that an avalanche of psychological problems is approaching you that you need to deal with alone, then start preparing your escape routes. You need to explain to your partner exactly what you are going to do during the break. High goals really bribe, just do not forget to really do what they promised.


Taking an indefinite leave only confirms the idea that a break is coming. Set a real period of time that you will spend separately and without any contact. At the appointed time (even if you are not completely rested), it is worth meeting with a partner to deal with the results of the experiment. Hiding your real feelings is not worth it, be honest.


The restriction in contacts should be extended to the inner circle. Flickering in the life of a partner, albeit through the stories of mutual acquaintances, only jeopardizes a positive outcome. Postpone joint events that you promised to attend, divide your leisure time into parts, and so on.


If you just began to lack sexual diversity, then start a conversation with this nuance. Perhaps the partner will be able to offer a more original way out of this situation than the search for random contacts in a limited time. In any case, the question of exclusivity during the pause should be raised, otherwise you can easily remain accused of treason.


You need to understand that such an offer can shake the self-esteem of a partner. Offer immediately the safest option with a legend, for example: you are away on business matters, during which mutual friends, relatives and uninvited observers will definitely not catch you. Reassure that the pause will not interfere with the other person’s daily routine and peace of mind.


A respite should not free you from simple joint affairs so much that the partner will spend all the free time on analyzing fallen responsibilities. The break will not happen the minute you decide to announce it, allocate enough time for packing, moving, paying bills and other household moments.


In any case, listen to the options that the partner is ready to offer. You may be able to find a hybrid option that’s right for you. Do not forget that one of the goals of such a trick is to improve existing relationships in which your couple should be no less comfortable than you.

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